Thursday, October 06, 2005

What are you doing...I was a penis for Halloween last year...

Its 4 in the morning and I am blogging. I am wide awake. Thinking about my job and what I need to accomplish by tomorrow(today), wondering if its that strong cup of Gorilla coffee that's keeping me up.

Or maybe it was the angry quilter?

Next door to my job, there is a small quilting shop that has been getting rained on by our air conditioner. Its really not that serious but there is a noticable puddle on the sidewalk in front of his store.

The angry quilter first appeared one day last month. My desk is in front of the elevator because I am an assistant. He came upstairs. I smiled thinking "what a cute old man. He looks like Santa's nebbishly skinny little brother...his beard is so white, so fluffy...ah! his bifoculs are hanging on his neck by a strap... how sweet"

Yummicoco: hello!

Angry Quilter: Yeah, your air conditioner is seriously leaking and its getting on my customers. Its against the law to have water dripping on people!

IS IT? AC water or as I like to call it, Urban Rain, drips on my head all the time in this city.

Angry Quilter: Yeah, so when are you going to get that fixed?

Yummicoco: Right away.

I did not look into it. I was hoping that it would just go away, that Fall would end the need of an AC. He came back a couple of times after that. I told my boss. He told me to tell the business manager. I did. Then, last week, as luck would have it, the leaking stopped.

Then the AC started to leak again this past Monday and by Tuesday I got yelled at by the Angry Quilter on the street in front of my job while the Building Manager and Rudy the UPS man look on like pussies.

Angry Quilter: This is bullshit... I am going to report you... This is against the law you know...You thought that this would just go away since its Fall... I want this cleared up by five...

I held my ground though... Telling him that I informed my boss but I was not authorized to make any executive decisions... That I was not going to continue arguing in the streets... That it will get taken care of...

Anyway, I told my boss... gave him Quilter's card... my boss laughed when I said that "I could take him" after he said "Don't worry about that Quilter. It'll get taken care of"

So, its now 5 pm Tuesday, The Angry Quilter arrives, pissed(but still adorable and old). "I am ready to meet your boss..."

Yummicoco: I am sorry but he is not available.

Angry Quilter: You are so obnoxious the way that you have led me on... I am going to report you... I am going to call the cops or something...

Yummicoco (thinking): So cute and fluffy... why can't you just get over it?

OK! So now the punchline:

We have a shitty elevator that takes days to come onto our floor.

After berating me (and berating me all of those times before) he is forced to stand in front of my desk to wait for the elevator.

He yells. He calls the elevator. He stands waiting as if he has left my office and is now in the lobby when in actuality he is in front of my desk. So, I sit there (bearly 2 feet away) watching him stand there in silence dying from supressed giggling because I am five, wondering how soft his beard really is...


Anonymous said...

I am heartless?


Anna said...

Santa's little bro is hilarious. But clearly a jerk - I hate when people yell at me because they think they're more important. Jerks.

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Anonymous said...

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