Snickers bar, anyone? What more can I say, top billin'!

I think Gatecrasher is outing JC Chasez as a fag.

This morning, Gatecrasher also delivered a blind item that sucked fatty.

Which dead blond star was sleeping with both her Haitian bodyguard and a very well-known NYC mogul at the same time?

John Mayer looks like some kind of arabic knight that is going to sell me into prostitution in this picture.



Some people call me milk!

Ice-skated like it was 1987 at Prospect Park with Sax. Lazily drank hot bovine-laced chocolate while chomping on cinnamon-y (and eggs!) churros. Why? Because it was all free and I am a bad girl. Was terrified that a boogey-man or one of the homeless was going to slash our throats as we walked through the uber-desolate park but alas we survived.

Learned the art of Ping Pong yesterday before watching Rome.

Happy Monday!

I guess Queens is running this muthafucka and then Pop goes my heart!

It's almost 1:30am and way past my nerdy bedtime.

Go see Music and Lyrics! Supercute however not the best film. I hate when Drew clenches her teeth together to fake a New York accident but I luv Hugh Grant! To see him thrusting his pelvis, singing corny 80s songs just makes my heart go pitter patter.

Argued with Lex (but it's all good!) in the cab about where to get dropped off and finally agreed to take the car to Houston Street.

As I walk to the train, I spot my cousin's company van JPEG. He's hanging out on the Bowery and convinces me to stay out longer.

I enter the Remote Lounge on 2nd and Bowery.

Doorman: Yo, who you wit?

I tell him.

Doorman: Walk down there, make a right and go downstairs.

In the basement, it hits me, I have just walked into 8 Mile and everyone has on a puffy coat with the fur trim hood except for me.

Did you know that there is a south side and a north side of Queens?

While I wait for my cousin's artist Curse to perform, the hostess Playgirl (transcending all Bronx-Boriqua space and time in sequenced hoodie, tight jeans and pointy lace-up boots) announces that Wyze G is going to take the stage.

Wyze G, like the people's champ that he is, bum-rushes the stage rocking a black sweatjacket with his name emblazoned in gold on both sides of the hood. He is a super-star, playing up to the video cameras pointed so close to his face, spitting rhymes to the few ladies in the audience. He was good.

Then Curse was up.

Representing JPEG hard(!), Curse is a more subduded playa with a good flow. He's not about pomp and circumstance. In "Bring it Back", he stresses that Hip Hop is not dead.

Then I took a cab home and tucked Sax into bed.

Good night!

Check out my "Show and Tell" with Michael Showalter

I love New York is a crock of shit: Wind me up and watch me...I don't know

So, our friend JRich is a muddled mess. Still in the faze of "I don't want to think about the future" and "I want to do something that makes a difference in this world", he just lets time pass him by. He's afraid to pick up the saxophone (so am I but I don't know how to play it) and lets his folk singing girlfriend ("yo, you got indigo girls on your iTunes, dude") boss him around.

Do I think I'm better than him? No.

There is something to be said about people who pee freely in the streets and in phone booths- they are not ashamed to take a chance. These fearless pissers see a clearing, drop trow and let the juices flow. That's what I want to do. Not pee on the corner of 35th and Broadway but seize an opportunity and run with it.

Finally watched some of "I love New York" last night. Does not compare to Flav but then again I am sick of that show anyway and I feel incredibly stupid for having been hooked on it in the first place. "New York" is an illiterate fool and her mother looks like a cross between a voodoo priest and a transvestite. Maybe the latino guy should not have asked if he could call New York his "negrita" but whatever. Bitch is wack.

Anyway, saw a screening of Warner Herzog's new film Rescue Dawn last week. "Nature will not work against you" ...or something like that. Brilliantly terrifying. Christian Bale and Steve Zahn were incredible.

This dude is definitely a Herzog fan. I'm a fan too, of course, but I think camel toes are even cooler: